A sunny Saturday...or maybe it's all a dream or an hallucination. We haven't had much sun lately, so I'm not sure. Dad/Grandpappy/Paco is on his way outside to start scooping up and chopping leaves to put out for the city leaf pick-up crew, who will fire up the leaf-sucking machine beginning on Monday.
A few days ago Dad checked with someone in the city offices to find out if it would be possible to zero in a bit closer on when the crew will be in our part of town so we don't kill the grass by piling leaves on it for two solid weeks. Nope, no can do--the reason being that there are only two guys on said crew, and they just don't know where they will be, and when (Hmmm...it just occurred to me that the St. Peter leaf pick-up crew might just be those two pilots who overshot the Mpls/St. Paul airport a couple of days ago and were out of communication for an hour.).
If the local Powers-That-Be would tune in to NUMB3RS on Friday evenings, they'd realize that they could predict where the leaf crew will be on any given day at any particular moment. All it takes is Cal Poly mathematician and former boy-genius Charlie Epps to work out a mathematical formula taking into account total street miles, minimum and maximum wind velocity, average leaf-sucker machine speed, annual volume of leaves sucked up, and anticipated lunch break length of the crew divided by their height and weight calculated in the base-8 system, and poof! we could know the exact time of our leaf pick up, thus saving the grass from certain death.
I spent much of the morning emptying the closets in the computer room and Annie's former bedroom. Where does all that crap come from? Both closets are a bit more organized now, after filling several garbage bags, sorting items to go to MRCI, and putting back what's left. I'm not done yet; the variety of distractions I've taken advantage of for the last hour put me in line for a procrastination award of some kind.
A few days ago Dad checked with someone in the city offices to find out if it would be possible to zero in a bit closer on when the crew will be in our part of town so we don't kill the grass by piling leaves on it for two solid weeks. Nope, no can do--the reason being that there are only two guys on said crew, and they just don't know where they will be, and when (Hmmm...it just occurred to me that the St. Peter leaf pick-up crew might just be those two pilots who overshot the Mpls/St. Paul airport a couple of days ago and were out of communication for an hour.).
If the local Powers-That-Be would tune in to NUMB3RS on Friday evenings, they'd realize that they could predict where the leaf crew will be on any given day at any particular moment. All it takes is Cal Poly mathematician and former boy-genius Charlie Epps to work out a mathematical formula taking into account total street miles, minimum and maximum wind velocity, average leaf-sucker machine speed, annual volume of leaves sucked up, and anticipated lunch break length of the crew divided by their height and weight calculated in the base-8 system, and poof! we could know the exact time of our leaf pick up, thus saving the grass from certain death.
I spent much of the morning emptying the closets in the computer room and Annie's former bedroom. Where does all that crap come from? Both closets are a bit more organized now, after filling several garbage bags, sorting items to go to MRCI, and putting back what's left. I'm not done yet; the variety of distractions I've taken advantage of for the last hour put me in line for a procrastination award of some kind.
4 comments:
I, mathematically challenged though I am, love that formula! It would work! I know it would!
I bet Annie could deliver those bags to MRCI... just bring 'em over on your next shift, Annie.
:)
Sorry. Had to write it.
I get dibs on the mermaid dress!
Thanks for setting Charlie up for the joke, Ma.
I just used the formula you described and expect the leaf dudes to stop by your house at approximately 1:42pm on Friday, Oct 30th.
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